Trust is a thing that is inherent in babies. Just watch, the little boogers will topple off the top of anything, surprised at the results. We adults patiently teach them caution and catch them when we can.
Continue readingStill learning
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“Trauma body” response – losing my second daughter
I don’t know why it surprises me anymore. Really. I just need to accept that this is part of my fabric and can come when I least expect it.
Continue readingIt would have been 5th grade
Time has not eased moments like these. They said it would. They lied.
Continue readingMy brain on depression
You have all heard the expression, you are your own worst enemy. I have always been that, but since Jesse and Bella died, at times, it is exponentially worse.
Continue readingThe power of sharing your story
I never knew I was able to, or, for that matter, had a gift for public speaking until I spoke to an over-flowing church for Jesse and Maribella’s memorial. After, many people commented and said, you are really good at that, especially under the circumstances, which got me thinking.
Continue readingA real break from it all
Traveling has always made my heart sing, ever since I was young. I never realized I liked history until I went to Spain for the first time, it gave me a different appreciation of culture and history that we just don’t have here as much. Now, travel is a chance for my brain and body to rest from the trauma, as I was reminded during our honeymoon to Greece.
Continue readingBody/mind hijack
I had a plan for writing today for today, but as with life, my body and mind have other ideas.
Continue readingEmptiness
There is an emptiness within that will never be filled, a broken heart. I ponder if her birthday is even harder than their death date?
Continue readingHappy almost 10th birthday Maribella…
I touch down into my body occasionally with this, and my body rejects it much like food that is spoiled. It is like, nope, sorry, not going there. Not possible. Not one little bit. But, alas, it’s true 🙁
Continue readingPlodding along
I think I want to plan a honeymoon each year about this time. It helps distract from the many things going on in my mind relating to the grief around Bella. Especially with her upcoming birthday…
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